It can be daunting to ask your spouse for a postnuptial agreement, but hard conversations are often necessary in a marriage. If thinking about broaching the topic with your spouse is overwhelming, continue reading to learn how to set yourself up for success. Remember that it is best to approach the conversation with openness and honesty. Reach out to a Memphis, Tennessee family law agreement attorney for more information and legal advice.
How Should I Ask My Spouse for a Postnuptial Agreement?
Prepare
Preparation is key. Do research on the topic, understanding exactly what a postnuptial agreement entails and why you believe it aligns with your needs as a couple. Ask yourself tough questions so you can be ready for when your spouse does the same. Consider why you want the postnup, where the feelings come from, if you have explored any other options, etc.
Anticipate the way your spouse may react to help you prepare for the different ways the conversation may go. You can even rehearse some important points beforehand to ensure you do not forget things you want to say.
Find the right time and place
The timing will probably not be perfect but you can set yourself up for success by finding an ideal time and place. Wait until there are no extra stressors in your or your spouse’s life and avoid bringing up the topic during a fight.
The location of the conversation is also important. Try not to initiate the discussion in a crowded area, while out with friends, etc. It is best to have the conversation near or at home where you know you will not be interrupted.
Share your feelings
Be completely honest with yourself and your partner. Give them the respect of being direct about what you want and why you want it. Explain the reason you have been thinking about it, emphasize that you are not looking for a divorce, and highlight the benefits the postnup offers. For example, you may say something like “As you know my parents’ divorce took a mental and financial toll on both of them, and, although I never want to get divorced, I want to avoid the pain and stress that they endured if we ever found ourselves ending our marriage.”
Allow them to respond
Talk with your partner about how they are feeling. Give them the opportunity to react and express the emotions going through their mind. They may be feeling a combination of confused, blindsided, angry, sad, overwhelmed, or somewhere in between. They could have additional questions for you or simply need to think.
Give them time and space
You had time to research and sort through your feelings before the discussion, which they did not. Allow them time to process how they want, either alone, with you, or by leaning on friends and family for support.
Plan to continue the discussion later on once you both have had time to regroup and consider your options. It is also important to get legal advice to learn if a postnup is the right option for you. Reach out to a skilled attorney today for more information.
